Lead From Experience

I have recently been asked, several times, about one very important question: How do you know you are leading people the right way? I could go into a lot of detail and explain the intricacies of leading, but to do that I would have to be an expert, which I am still a student. I could speak to the heart of the question asked by reciting Biblical truths, but I will not patronize you with things you already know. Instead I will explain how I lead, and how I see leadership in general by borrowing an idea from someone (I am not actually remembering whom at this moment).

I lead best from experience. The fact that I have been down a lot of roads through cognitive energy and or physically gone down some roads are probably the two most important pools I draw my experience from. I take time and energy placing myself in situations I have not come across, doing research, asking the question “what if I were in those shoes”…etc. I do everything I can to lead students, peers, and maybe even some adults in a faith-centered relationship with Jesus. Having said that, I have found experience to be the best teacher for my leadership. I have lead athletic teams, small groups, teams at work, restaurant teams, teams of paid staff, teams of volunteers and teams of students. Each team having its own intricacies and its own unique features. I have loved leading. I love leading so much that I spend my quality time not diving into a good novel, but diving into leadership development books and papers. So experience with leadership has been my best teacher. I lead from knowledge and understanding of what college is like, because I was recently there. I help lead students from high school into college because I have experience being misled into thinking I had it all figured out. I help lead college students into the “real world” (whatever that means), because I have gone through that transition. Experience has taught me well.

As a caviate to experience teaching me well, I also lead from counsel. This is the wisest thing I have ever done. I have a group of “older than me” gentlemen who are great men of God that I have surrounded my decision making process with. It has to pass the group of mentors I have set before me. In the same way that I lead others from my experience, they lead me with theirs. I tap into their knowledge and understanding, and though it is difficult at times, I will change my plans and ideas when reasoned with wisdom from their experience.

Now for my analogy that I stole. I cannot remember where I heard this. If I had to guess it was from Andy Stanley, but I cannot recall. Leadership is a lot like driving a car at night. You can only really see up to your headlights. Whether they are bright lights or dimmers, your headlights guide the way. The truth is, there is not much else you can see passed the head lights. You know there is more road out there to drive. You know that the more you move forward the more you will find. Truthfully, this analogy keeps me going. If we want to see what is at the end of our headlights, we have to keep moving forward. In this analogy, if you have counsel, it is like driving with bright lights. You have more range of vision, but the fact remains; if you want to see what is next, you have to move forward.

We can never be 100% sure that we are leading in the right way, so we have to do our best to not be 100% rigid. We need to give flexibility to our plans, our desires, and our leadership. However, if you are modeling a leadership style that Jesus modeled, you are probably in the right ball park.

Middle school students: Everyone was awkward in middle school. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Try to talk about it with people older than you and be honest about how you feel.
High school students: Freshman year of college or your first year away from home WILL change you. Will you be ready for that change? Will it be good change or not?
College students: The decisions you make in college are part of the story you tell after college. Are you going to be able to tell your whole story? (I know this is from Andy) What if you started over right now? You want to tell your whole story. Trust me.
Young adults: Everyone is looking for their thing/job/nitch. Find your passion first and see where your passion and talents align. That is the sweet spot.

EVERYONE: No matter how old you are or how young… FIND MENTORS! Find wise counsel, buckle up, and listen. Ultimately the choice is yours, but I would not make it without counsel. The wisest man in the world had a lot to say about seeking wise counsel. You will not regret it, but that has just been my experience.
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Food for thought: If you are a leader, people are following you (if not, you are not a leader). Lead well. It matters how you lead. Are you leading well? Where are you leading your followers?