Ardant Worship

This may be a surprise to some of you, but ardent worship is quite scary to me. The concept makes me feel amazingly vulnerable. Even now I can think of times I have personally cried to a song that I was playing for a worship set or singing in the crowd.

I watch videos on youtube all of the time of people worshiping. Some of the most pure worship I have ever seen can be found on youtube. Hands spread out to give the Holy Spirit more room to land, hearts ripping out of their chests. I see eyes soaked with passion and mouths wide with joy. I see faces looking like they are singing directly to Jesus. I see these people laying down heads on the ground because they cannot stand. I see the Spirit moving through some through the form of dance. I see people who know nothing to do than just sit there and look up.

It scares me a lot of the time. I think about this thing called worship. I think of singing to a God that is so big, and so huge and so amazing and I feel like it does not at all matter how loud or well I sing, at the end of the day, a song and a passion soaked heart are all I have to offer. It is a tough thing for me to understand; God wanting me to sing to Him. I know that God loves it when we sing to Him. He loves worship, I mean we are created for it. He loves our praise, I mean, everything we do should praise Him. But in the stillness, in the moments I feel faint, I know that I am scared out of my mind, because in the stillness, in the moments I feel faint I feel completely inadequate and I feel that God could do better.

I am not saying that it is a bad thing, being vulnerable, I am simply saying that it scares me, if I am being completely honest. I would much rather be scared and in love with a God that can save me from anything and everything and give all that I have to Him in praise and worship, than to be confident in my own abilities.

With everything, we will shout for your praise Jesus.
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Food for thought: In the moments you feel this way, remember that God is much bigger than what we hope to offer, but he loves the little bit we all individually contribute to His kingdom. No doubt about that in my mind. If he did not, He would not have sent Jesus.